Photo by Marisa Page

They are ruling the new music space but most of them would probably not get into the Dark Room on a Monday night. 2009’s top 3 breakthrough indie bands have made it a memorable year. But don’t expect to see them in Nylon’s next fashion issue.

Let’s take a look at AnCo for example – also sometimes known in the real world as Animal Collective. The Brooklyn band has become the cool kids’ (and Pitchfork’s) favorite new thing in the world. But it’s sometimes hard to know if the AnCo kids are on their way to play at Pete’s Candy Store or to geek out at Blogworld – and the Spaceman shirts / oversized hoodies are not really helping. Well the truth is when you’re called (or call yourself) Panda Bear and Avey Tare that does compensate for not looking like you vintage shop by the pound.

Another good example is SF’s new music sensation: Girls. 2010 is looking promising for the Mission band and they will most likely not only play at the Bottom of the Hill this year. But it also looks like they forgot to stop at Therapy on 16th and Valencia before they started their national tour last month. We know the 1990’s are making a strong come back and the long hair / River Phoenix-ish style of the avant-garde Girls members are probably not a coincidence.

And finally Vampire Weekend. Let’s see… who do they remind you of? Is it your annoying classmate who always turns in his assignments early? Or that d-bag who reads The Economist in the 30X bus? Or maybe your co-worker who wears a “Stanford” shirt every Friday to let the whole world knows he fucking went there? Well a little of everything… and that’s the beauty of it.

Yep, not every band in 2009 looked like Nylon’s Plastiscines. And that’s probably why it was such a good year…

Tired of being too mainstream? Here are the top 10 resolutions to make 2010 your hipster year.

1. Listen to a band that hasn’t made it to Wikipedia yet

2. Stop wearing pants that have pockets you can stick your hands in.

3. Attend an art class at a state university

4. Bring back a style that’s totally old school

5. Get the best bike on the block

6. Go to a Cantora Records showcase

7. Stop liking Lady Gaga

8. Buy a Mach3 and some hair gel

9. Dance the hell out of a 1990’s party

10. Finally start watching Supernews – just because we love it

There’s a new trend in Williamsburg of hipsters sporting upper-lip mustaches and closely cropped hair (Brad Pitt in inglorious bastards).
What’s the reason behind that? Anita

by Dyers.org

Recently spotted on the East Coast, the short hair/skinny mustache combo seems to be the latest hair trend of the cool kids. Different from what we’ve seen so far in the hipster world, the new style surprises quite a few. So what happened to the I-make-$10/hour-(including tips) shaggy grooming style? Is looking sharp the new black? Let’s look into the two parts of the equation in order to fully understand such a dramatic change.

1. From bushy to skinny:

Throughout the centuries, many political figures, great influencers and artists have made their distinctive facial grooming a part of history. The full beard made an acclaimed entrance in the pop scene when the Beatles went into their meditative Abbey Road period. For the first time, the homeless facial hair style was no longer only seen inside a Goodwill store. The masses became fond of the yeti trend and Gillette experienced its first recession with the hippie movement.

It is around 2005 that the bushy facial hair style started rocking the cool world. A purposely ungroomed face became one of the dominant trends of the indie scene. But like any other successful hipster story, the cool era of the bum style soon came to an end. After seeing it on the David Letterman show and all over Jezebel’s Snapjudgment column, the masses have now adopted the bearded style too. And it looks like this holiday season will be another tough one for the Mach3.

Naturally, the cool kids had to go in search of a new distinctive facial hair style. With cool origins that can be traced as far back as the stone razor age, the mustache was the ideal solution. Especially when the discovery of tattooed mummies from the same era confirmed that the upper-lip style was already a part of the cool ‘prehipsteric’ world. After glory years in the 70’s, the mustache was totally out of style for over 2 decades. So it is naturally that the cool kids decided to rescue it. After a few influencers of the cool world were recently spotted growing out a Burt Reynolds-ish, thin ’stache, the skinny upper lip movement is growing stronger everyday. It has now officially become one of the most recent signs of membership to the hipster world – contrasting with the uncontrollable beards and other messy facial hair seen on the masses.

2. From shaggy to croppy:

A very similar explanation lays in the origins of the cropped hair style’s cool faith. A perfect coiffe is every hipster’s signature. Asymmetry, shaggy style, everything is permitted as long as it reflects the contradictive hair values every indie kids stand for: effortlessness and complexity. Keeping up with such standards is made possible by the fact that cool kids all have a Hairdresser Hipster (breed description to come soon) in their inner circle of friends.

But things started going wrong in the cool hair world when a corporate finance giant tried to leverage the hipster trend. In early 2008, Mastercard released its “looking like you just rolled out of bed” tv spot. The masses realized that they too could look like they coolly don’t care. From your little cousin in Idaho to Ashley Simpson, everybody adopted some kind of hipster-looking hairstyle. And few months later Zac Efron was on the cover of Rolling Stones.

The cool kids immediately started experimenting all kinds of crazy hairstyles that only Lady Gaga could wear, but soon realized that the only way out from this mainstream mess was to go for a total different, unexpected style. The cleaner, Fonzie-ish look immediately confused the masses – which usually keeps them away for at least 6 months. In addition, it presents many other advantages: a beat generation touch (the poets in skinny jeans are often qualified the ancestors of the cool kids), a 50’s vintage style, and a Burt Reynolds in a 1978 Pontiac Trans-Am touch – which we know is always good.

With the recent popularity of the civil war hair style among the masses, hipsters from all over the world were forced to re-think their grooming. We can conclude that the emerging cropped hair/skinny ‘stache style is clearly a direct response from the cool kids to the mainstream world adopting the shaggy hair/bearded look. And Gomez Adams is now officially the new hipster hair model. As of Gillette… Well rumors say they might relocate their HQ on the alt side on the Brooklyn Bridge while waiting for brighter mainstream days.

Want to know whether American Apparel really still is the place where hipsters buy their low-cut V-neck shirts? Are you wondering why it is so wrong to listen to the Dave Matthews Band and how a corporation like Apple became a favorite in the cool kids world? Send us all your questions Send us all your questions and we’ll provide you with the most nonobjective, accurate answers.

Want to give your mainstream friends a little cool touch this holiday season? Here is what you can get them:

Photo by J.

1. Some Festival Party Gear

2. A Taxidermy Mammal

3. A Faux-fur Hat

4. The Official NYC Bike Polo Shirt

5. Hipster Foldables

6. A Dinner at Bean Bag

7. AnCo’s Fall Be Kind

8. A Nice Hipster Claus Card

9. The 2010 Mustache Calendar

10. Cheerful Christmas ornaments

“What do you mean they have only one star on Yelp?”

Photo by J.

The residents of Eternia are back. And after many years spent in the closet, they’ve decided that they too have the right to be cool. Follow them in their journey as they try to live the hipster dream and fit in the cool world.

Photo by Marisa Page

With a strong desire to be a part of the hipster world but not quite ready to give up on expensive clothes and face cream, Barneys Hipsters emerged a few years ago looking like the love child of a yuppie and Amy Winehouse. Despite their contradictory lifestyle which violates many of the 10 immutable original hipster laws, their unconditional thirst of coolness is such that they’ve rapidly reached the golden gates of the hipstersphere.

Barneys hipsters usually come from a fairly privileged, upper middle class background. Well-educated with a degree in international relations or communications from Berkeley, they work in advertising, PR, marketing, publishing or any other media-related company as long as it sounds cool and hard-to-get-into. They pride themselves on their eco-friendly values and almost exclusively shop at Whole Foods or other overpriced organic supermarkets where one of their less fortunate but so-cool-to-know traditional hipster friends works. Advocates of a healthy lifestyle and diet, they generally do not consume addictive substances – except on week-ends and occasional week nights . Yoga is of course the Barneys Hipster’s favorite form of exercise – as long as the club they frequent has Mighty Leaf tea and is hippie-free. No, Barneys Hipsters do not like hippies and think they got it all wrong except for the Beatles and Bob Dylan.

Barneys Hipsters love fashion and, unlike the traditional hipster, openly admit their expensive addiction to skinny jeans and soft baby lamb skin Marc Jacobs handbags. But while they can splurge on a $500 pair of Fiorentini + Baker boots, they generally know how to restrain themselves and are rarely seen shopping outside of the sale rack. Their fashion trademark is to mix and match H&M type of hipster apparel with high-end designer clothes, carefully making sure their outfit doesn’t look ostentatious but still high-end.

The only roommate a Barneys Hipster will ever consider is a cat or a Barneys boyfriend with expensive camera equipment. Generally living in up & coming neighborhoods, Barneys Hipsters are the primary cause of rent increase in large urban areas which results in the constant migration of traditional hipsters to Portland and more recently hipster’s new refuge, Austin. Because they are so open-minded, Barneys Hipsters have a very diverse circle of friends. They quickly adapt to any type of surroundings and can easily transition from a birthday brunch in the Marina to a night at the Geary Club the same day.

So while Barneys Hipsters are not entirely living the real hipster dream, the up and coming breed is smartly pulling the best of both worlds. And with all the money saved every year at Barneys’ annual designer sale, they secure a comfortable but cool future for themselves, full of complexity, hipsterity and designer clothes.

Photo by J.

It’s everywhere! On your tween sister’s see-through shirts, F21’s window display, and now even Drew Barrymore’s legs. For the last couple of years, plaid has been spreading faster than swine flu. And what was once a distinctive sign of membership to the cool world is being immoderately devoured by the masses. So why is plaid so popular? How come tweens like it almost as much as R-Patz’s wrinkly hoodies? Will the cool pattern remain a hipster favorite?

In order to explain the popularity of plaid, we need to travel back to the 5th Century to Scotland where the crisscross design was at the time also known as Tartan. Interestingly – but maybe not coincidentally – it was already some kind of attire used by many of the clans of the already-hip kingdom to distinguish themselves from one another. Throughout the centuries, royal and distinctive families kept embracing the pattern to flash their affiliation with a certain class. It’s in the early 1900’s that the design made its real fashion debut. And its association with royalty made it a favorite in upper-class wardrobes of conventional Britain.

So how did plaid become so appealing to the cool kids? Punk music was the first trend to give the pattern a cool makeover. To voice their discontent with the ruling society, punk kids from all around the world started wearing plaid clothes in all sort of unconventional ways. And a couple of music videos later, Sid Vicious had turned the royal pattern into a symbol of anti-establishment. After a quick but quite memorable kaleidoscopic period in the 80’s, plaid remained unloved in the attic for a few years. But finally came back stronger than ever in the early 90’s. With a little help from his friends Noel & Liam, fashion giant Burberry gave the checkered pattern a rock’n roll and inexplicable rebellious touch. Hipsters from all over the world fell in love with the crisscross lifestyle and plaid instantly became an essential part of the indie fashion scene.

So despite its recent mass-production, it seems like the pattern has survived the test of time. And will officially remain a symbol of the cool world. But most importantly it succeeded where so many failed: make Hayden Panettiere trade her cheerleader pom poms for a somehow more acceptable outfit.

While Vampire-in-Chief Robert Pattinson and his pale friends are unsurprisingly popular among the masses, it seems like female hipsters too have found in the bloodsucking kind a new way to carry on the still-inexplicable Harry Potter love that started a few years ago.

Sci-fi literature has always been acclaimed by the indie estrogen world – especially if it’s a children’s book and features a hero with no chest hair. So while the Hogwarts saga is coming to an end, it is naturally that Forks became the center of attention of the cool ladies. But how can something so mass-oriented be that popular among the indie crowds? A few factors explain the forbidden love story. Socially-awkward heroes generally rejected by the masses. A bunch of ghost-like British actors walking down the red carpet in miniskirt and Converse. And a soundtrack that makes the Music Café line-up at Sundance look mainstream.

The Twilight Saga: New Moon opens on 11/20/09.

Photo by Marisa Page

For a long time the victim of persecution and abuse from the merciless hipster world, a group of former high school science contest winners with a surprising sense of fashion united to show that geeks too have the right to be cool. Spreading faster than the ILOVEYOU virus, MacHipsters officially claimed their existence in the early 2000’s, openly admitting their dual addiction to skinny jeans and any form of new, overpriced technology – especially if it has an Apple on it.

Machipsters usually travel in packs of 3 or 4, but have an extended social media network of virtual Facebook friends. In order to avoid and clearly set themselves apart from the uncool Starbucks PC crowd they like to frequent an independent coffee shop where they can distantly befriend some of the traditional hipsters. Because of the unstoppable proliferation of MacBooks among the masses, MacHipsters were forced to quickly develop their own language in order to distinguish a member of their breed from the average Apple noob. Indeed, technology-oriented conversations are one of the MacHipsters’ favorite pastimes; the ideal setting for such cerebral confabulations being around a pool table at a dive bar that serves PBR. But while they enjoy the company of their peers, MacHipsters do need a high amount of isolation time to perform vital activities such as reading news.ycombinator.com and downloading movies to their RAID5 NAS (whatever that is).

MacHipsters openly despise any form of shopping unless it can be performed via paypal. However, when the time comes to go search for their yearly supply of discounted, slightly undersized, plaid shirts, they sometimes visit outlets such as Nordstrom Rack. While they are not (or at least claim to be) interested in fashion, MacHipsters do respect a certain dress code that definitely, but not too explicitly, reveals their ties to the hipster world. Ben Sherman polos, a pair of Converse and fitted t-shirts with some incomprehensible science-related quote are the main components of their wardrobe. However, they sometimes criminally violate hipster rule #10 and can be spotted wearing boot cut jeans or a pair of non-vintage running shoes.

Ambitious entrepreneurs, MacHipsters excel in various sectors such as Web design, systems administration (also known to the masses as hooking up a bunch of computers together) and more lately clean tech. Sometimes working 15 hours a day, sometimes only 2 hours a week out of a coffee shop, the MacHipsters’ daily schedule presents an inexplicable flexibility and strong similarities to the one of the traditional hipster, but somehow always mysteriously results in a six-figure salary. Financial success is indeed mandatory for their general sense of self-accomplishment and necessary to satisfy their costly needs. Sometimes cautious about their spending, they can immoderately splurge on a rare fixed-gear bike frame or the latest Canon 1D, but strangely enter a phase of endless complaints when having to pay for archaic products such as cable tv.

Due to the fact that 99.9% of MacHipsters are male, it is naturally and inevitably that they pair up with a female hipster from another breed. With a limited ability to communicate with the ignorant outside world, they also like to surround themselves with the company of a hipster pet, with whom they often develop a unique bond enabling them to express basic human feelings.

After many endless years of banishment, it is safe to assume that MacHipsters no longer need to hide their sci-fi books to fit in the cool world. Furtively in hope of achieving their Google dream, the fast-developing breed proved once and for all that hipsters and computer club geeks can live happily ever after in an Apple-shaped world.

Photo by J.

Once an incontestable ruler of the complex hipster fashion world, American Apparel has lately been the target of overwhelming critics from indie fashionistas; some even accusing the fashion giant of being one of the architects behind the conspiracy that brought leggings and wristbands to the masses. And it is legitimately that we can ask ourselves whether the LA brand has forever lost its prestigious status or still remains a hipster favorite.

Created 20 years ago by fashion school drop out Dov Charney, American Apparel rapidly became the unlabeled trademark of the indie world; making their Made in Downtown LA hoodie a must-have in every cool closet of California. But like any successful hipster story, the brand soon found itself at the mercy of the masses and their desperate crusade to look cool. Unable to resist easy, mainstream money, the one Million Garments a Week company took a wrong turn in 2007. With the opening of their first ‘California Vintage’ store, AA endangered hipster breeds from all across the globe by giving common mortals access to the art of vintage clothing. But things got even uglier when a year later the brand crossed the unforgivable line of pet clothing. It is sadly that hipsters woke up one morning to find their favorite jersey tees had been stolen by a bunch of tea cup chihuahuas. And naturally started questioning if their pair of leggings was really worth all that mainstream drama.

So let’s face it: we can all agree that the overwhelming critics are somehow justified. But despite all the faux-pas, it is important to keep in mind how on many occasions the company proved its strong commitment to the uncommon world. While MTV succumbed to tweensteria by showing off a Selena Gomez Sears ad at the last VMAs, the Downtown LA brand continues to run campaigns featuring adult actresses in outfits that only Jenny Lewis could wear. When Ashton Kutcher started wandering around Venice Beach in a trucker hat, AA opened a store on Sunset and Alvarado, showing lost LA hipster souls a way to their new Echo Park refuge. But most importantly let’s not forget the strong values deeply cherished by hipster politics that the Sweatshop Free company stands for: immigrant rights, vegan-friendly clothes and a bicycle lending program for all employees.

So despite a few mainstream mistakes, American Apparel has established itself as one of the undethronable leaders of the hipster clothing industry. And it is with certainty that we can conclude the Made in Downtown LA hoodies will long remain a favorite in happy Echo Park homes.

“Hey guys, I don’t think I have anything cool to wear this year for Halloween”

Photo by J.

The residents of Eternia are back. And after many years spent in the closet, they’ve decided that they too have the right to be cool. Follow them in their journey as they try to live the hipster dream and fit in the cool world.